Are you listening?

My friend David is a public school teacher. He told me once that when he comes back to work after Yom Kippur, the non Jewish teachers ask him "Did you enjoy your holiday?" It took him a while to come up with an answer he feels comfortable with ("It was very meaningful".) So, did you enjoy Tisha B'Av?

Va'Etchanan is read right after Tisha B'Av. It's a good choice. There are a lot of comforting passages in it. A lot of stuff we need to be reminded of on a regular basis.

Moshe speaks about Sinai. How special this event was. How unique. Never before and never again does G-d speak to an entire group of people.  Moshe is reminding them (and us) how very precious such a moment is. How awed and amazed they were when it happened. And how deeply runs the commitment they have taken upon themselves and their children for generations to come, to obey G-d. Moshe reminds them, too, about how they could not stand the greatness of G-D's voice and asked to stand back and let Moshe do the hearing. It's an interesting thing about hearing, isn't it? They asked Moshe to do the hearing for them, but what about the listening?

This is where we find the most famous line in Judaism. Its defining statement. The Sh'ma. Notice how the Sh'ma is not a prayer in the classical sense. It is not directed at G-d but at the people. The Sh'ma is about the very special, very precious connection between G-d and His people. It is followed immediately by a passage that became known as the Ve'Ahavta. How very unique that is. Not to talk about obeying G-d, revering Him or following His commandments, but about loving Him.

 

There is so much shouting and arguing within Judaism lately (OK, nothing new, I know), not to mention between all the other religions in the world. All about how to obey G-D's word (or even, what exactly it is) yet there is surprisingly little talk, study or instructions regarding loving Him. People certainly expect G-d to love them, of course, but how many consider reciprocating?

When the Israelites were bowled over by G-D's voice, He said to Moshe: Oh, I wish they would always revere me so well and keep my commandments so that they and their children will be well forever (D'varim 5:25-26) So does He want us to revere Him or to love Him? Whose voice do we hear in the Sh'ma and Ve'Ahavta?

Should we obey the law because we fear G-d? respect Him? revere Him? or should we sometimes just do what He says simply because we love Him?

In any case, I find this parasha very comforting, as I said. The events we mourn on Tishav B'Av came about because of lack of love (for G-d or man.) They also happened because of people forgetting their promise at Sinai. How can anyone forget something so awesome? Because we don't "listen" any more. And I don't mean to the rabbis or the teachers or the leaders (although that's true as well.) No, we stopped listening to the still small voice inside us (and no wonder, with all the noise pollution around.) And we stopped listening because we lost the love.

When you no longer love someone, you have no interest in listening to them and pretty soon you lose the habit of paying attention. And when you no longer listen, how can you follow their wishes?

That's why we must read the Torah again and again. To remind ourselves that once upon a time, at the foot of a mountain, our ancestors witnessed something no one else ever did and they made a promise to listen. And to love. And we can find comfort in this. Because, while we may have forgotten, G-d did not.

The ultimate food of love and comfort is, of course, chocolate. I personally am not crazy about it (which makes me crazy in the eyes of everyone else) but I am surrounded by many chocoholics and I offer the following for their comfort.

Chocolate for comfortable listening

6 eggs, separated

Pinch salt

1 1/4 cup sugar

7 Tbs unsalted butter, softened

5 1/2 oz chopped walnuts

7 oz bittersweet chocolate, melted

Beat egg whites with a pinch of salt until they form soft peaks.

Add sugar and beat until they form stiff peaks.

Add egg yolks, butter, walnuts and melted chocolate. Mix well.

Measure one cup of the mixture and reserve.

Pour the rest of the mixture into a 8x8 baking pan. Bake at 350F for 45-60 minutes or until it's dry in the center.

Take out of the oven and immediately spread the reserved cup of chocolate mixture over the cake.

Not being a chocoholic I cannot properly recommend it except to say that when my brother was little, the promise of this cake was the only way we got him to behave. Then he grew up.